Your recent decision to ban high alcohol beer really makes no sense to us, but deep down we know you only did it because you care.
Even though we like to think we are all growned up now, sometimes we still like to drink beer like our Daddies did.
We remember how they would drink and then act all happy crazy and sometimes that was a bit scary. You would come and gather us up, like a hen gathers her chicks, and under your apron we would find refuge from those decadent swillers.
Now that you are making sure we can never follow their footsteps into debauchery, we are wondering when you will ban the drinks they liked; whiskey and vodka and wine, which have much higher alcohol content than the beer you forbid us to drink. Why can we still buy that at the local liquor store?
Are you sure you didn't do this because your boyfriends at Labatts and Molson don't make any good tasting high alcohol beer, but dirty, small-minded local boys do?
In our sad moments, we sometimes think those big-business boyfriends who come around to visit so often have convinced you to "do things" by giving you all those pretty gifts and cash.
But that would make you... oh, Mom. Forgive us for doubting your pure intentions.
We hope you will let us drink good beer in the future, but if you don't we know its for our own good.
Never doubting your love for us,
The Sons of Alberta
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